Florida weather never ceases to amaze me. Yesterday morning on the news the weather man, um I'm sorry the Meteorologist, provided some technical weather explanation involving wind and several contradicting hand motions to me and the rest of the viewing public. Here's the thing, I don't really require the aforementioned hand gestures, nor do I need to know what type of pressure system is building or breaking. What I require and what I heard thanks to my keen ability to block out the dull and mundane is "blah, blah, wind, blah, blah, its not going to rain today". Clearly the absence of a prevening thunderstorm, made me just as pleased as punch, a bit because lightening storms are not awesome in my line of work and tend to keep me here past normal business hours, but mostly because I lack good vision and driving home in inclement weather is not a joy of mine.
I think yesterday the meteorologist may have accidentally made an upward hand gesture when he should have made a downward hand gesture, because at about 10 till 5 the skys opened up over our sleepy little town and dumped some buckets on us. Amazingly enough, had I worked 3 miles to the north, south, eat or west of the building I actually work in, I would have thought that weather man really knew his stuff...but alas I do not. I made a mad dash out of the building hopping, unsuccessfully i might add, over puddle after puddle, jumped in my car and assessed the damage. Wet shoes, wet socks, every square inch of my drivers side was rain spotted. It was almost as if the rain was not coming from the sky but being shot out of a giant squirt gun as the horizontal rain peppered Bruce's drivers side window. I drove home white knuckled, butt scooted up to the front of the seat so I was sitting about as close to the windshield as Momma, squinting out the white lines and hugging as close to them as possible. Ten minutes later I began to see the sunshine Florida is famous for and I was able to ease back into a normal, more comfortable driving position, or what my momma calls, 'laying down while driving'. It occurred to me at this point that in the 2 years and 11 months that I've owned Bruce, I haven't changed the windshield wipers. Being the detective that I am I deduced that this is in fact the reason the rain is not so much wiped from my windshield when I drive, but more smeared across it.
One quick stop at Walmart later and I not only purchased a couple new blades but also learned that these should technically be changed every six months, or at the very least once a year. Who knew. The weather man says no rain today so I don't know if I'll get to try them out but you never know.
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...at least god made you pretty.
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