St. Patty's Day holds a special place in my heart, not only because it is a holiday that is celebrated by dressing in a color that makes my eyes 'pop', getting kissed, and drinking green beers but also because it marks the anniversary of yours truly becoming a Floridian. It was four years ago today that my white behind moved south and never looked back. In honor of the wonderful mood this day puts me in, I would like to talk a little bit about love.
I never had a hard time saying I love you. I like the yucky love stuff, which is odd because I tend to surround myself with people who don’t so much enjoy it. Nonetheless, I’m a lover not a fighter, and not just because most 6 year olds could kick my ass (yeah, I can only do 14 pushups in one minute). Truth be told, I don’t love easily, but when I do get to the point where a relationship has evolved and is filled with trust, communication, and the happiness that love brings, I feel like it’s important to tell a person you love them every chance you get. That being said…
Beer, I adore you. I want to write you poems and send flowers to your office. I want to stand outside your window, hold my stereo above my head and blast love songs all night. I want to throw pebbles at your window when you’re grounded, and stick love notes in your locker. In a word the feelings that I have for you could be summed up simply by ‘love’. Just thought you should know.
Happy St. Patty’s Day everyone, and Happy Florida Anniversary to No-Longer-Easy-E.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Monday, March 15, 2010
I may actually be sleep typing this..
Today I rolled out of bed at what felt like 6am, though the clock indicated that it was in fact 7am, and I quickly became angered at Day Light Savings for robbing me of an hour of sleep. I guess my true anger should have been aimed at Benjamin Franklin as he was the a.hole who came up with it in the first place.
Here's the thing, I don't live on a farm and require the extra daylight to pick my crop, nor as Ben intended am I saving money on candles. I actually grew up in a state that never participated in Day Light Savings time and honestly, now living in a state that does participate, not really seeing much difference aside from the fact that one day a year I wake up exhausted.
I know I'm not the only person in the world suffering this morning as my office was basically zombieland up until about 1 o'clock. Today, there was no discussion of the fun things people did on their weekend off, only blank stares at computer screens or in some cases at the wall. I popped out of my exhaustion induced haze only after using my lunch hour to take a nap in my car, another person said f it and went home, and two others actually forgot about the time change all together because they only use cell phones as clocks and just plain didn't understand why they were so tired.
Here's the thing, I don't live on a farm and require the extra daylight to pick my crop, nor as Ben intended am I saving money on candles. I actually grew up in a state that never participated in Day Light Savings time and honestly, now living in a state that does participate, not really seeing much difference aside from the fact that one day a year I wake up exhausted.
I know I'm not the only person in the world suffering this morning as my office was basically zombieland up until about 1 o'clock. Today, there was no discussion of the fun things people did on their weekend off, only blank stares at computer screens or in some cases at the wall. I popped out of my exhaustion induced haze only after using my lunch hour to take a nap in my car, another person said f it and went home, and two others actually forgot about the time change all together because they only use cell phones as clocks and just plain didn't understand why they were so tired.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
And I was like baby baby baby oh...
Up until about a week a half ago I actually thought the small child who sings that age inappropriate "Baby" song's name was Justin Wiener.
As a side note...I can not get it out of my head, catchy song singing little bastard. That song is like waffle house, you know you shouldn't like it....but you do. I haven't felt like this since I couldn't stop singing about Jordin Sparks's Tattoo.
As a side note...I can not get it out of my head, catchy song singing little bastard. That song is like waffle house, you know you shouldn't like it....but you do. I haven't felt like this since I couldn't stop singing about Jordin Sparks's Tattoo.
Monday, March 8, 2010
Hmmm
Today I received the magazine "Get Married: the shopping and trend guide for the savvy bride" in the mail. For some reason I believe this was in error, or someone thought it would be funny to buy me a subscription.
I'm perplexed.
I'm perplexed.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
The art of keeping up with yesterday
I’ve always been a believer that there is nothing like the last minute to get things done, to let panic take over for inspiration, if you will. Well in this fashion I have waited until the last month to obtain the around 30 continuing education hours I need to maintain a certification that I hold. Luckily there are a wealth of classes online that, while boring, will make it possible to complete this task and ultimately reward and encourage my procrastination. Really, I’ll never learn a lesson if I can continue to get by.
While taking the aforementioned interweb classes this week I saw a slide that just made me laugh out loud and I thought I would share. From a course on epidemiology:
Below is a list of actual chief complaints collected from participating hospital systems:
-Stuck bead in nose
-Fish hook in ear
-Fell and laid in yard for a couple hours
-Fell onto cactus
-Squirrel bite
-Right foot pain, dropped turkey (2 days before Thanksgiving)
-Run over by golf cart
-Odd behavior after eating fresh peaches
-Blue plate special
-Talking to dead people
I’m not so sure what exactly I was supposed to learn from that, perhaps that it is quite difficult to determine whether there is an epidemic or outbreak of a certain disease when this is what is actually reported by people. However, I can confidently say what I did learn is that people are hilarious and god made a lot of them aesthetically intelligent.
While taking the aforementioned interweb classes this week I saw a slide that just made me laugh out loud and I thought I would share. From a course on epidemiology:
Below is a list of actual chief complaints collected from participating hospital systems:
-Stuck bead in nose
-Fish hook in ear
-Fell and laid in yard for a couple hours
-Fell onto cactus
-Squirrel bite
-Right foot pain, dropped turkey (2 days before Thanksgiving)
-Run over by golf cart
-Odd behavior after eating fresh peaches
-Blue plate special
-Talking to dead people
I’m not so sure what exactly I was supposed to learn from that, perhaps that it is quite difficult to determine whether there is an epidemic or outbreak of a certain disease when this is what is actually reported by people. However, I can confidently say what I did learn is that people are hilarious and god made a lot of them aesthetically intelligent.
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
A's Yearbook
Most Likely to Succeed
Ten Key Ninja and Patty Cakes
Ten Key Ninja and Patty Cakes
Ten Key Ninja
I met Ten Key Ninja through Intern about a year ago. She is a regular visitor to FMB and consequently Intern’s personal travel agent. We hope she will one day be a full time resident of the sunshiny state but until then she will be ten-keying like a pro in the blistery north. She enjoys comedy shows, diy cosmetology, and travel.
Patty Cakes
Patty Cakes is the newest edition to my family after marrying The Gray Lining in September. He is the brother I always wanted and I couldn’t make a better match for The Gray Lining. If this little tid-bit from their pre-wedding dance lessons isn’t a metaphor for their marriage then I don’t know what is….The Gray Lining was continuously told to not lead and let Patty Cakes be ‘the man’.
Both Ten Key Ninja and Patty Cakes are accountants in the bright lights big city of Chicago. They dress up to go to work and ten key all day (at least that’s what I think). For that, Ten Key Ninja and Patty Cakes I award you “Most Likely to Succeed”. Congrats! Monday, March 1, 2010
How to take a road trip…
There are a lot of things I want to do in my life, many of which should be on my Murtough list, because as young as I am at heart, my body sometimes actually feels my age. The story I will share today is one that should be chilling pretty high on that list but being the ‘peter pan’ that I am I will share with you, the tale of my most recent adventure.
As you may have read recently, the Kissy Faced Booty Shaker decided to take a big leap and move all the way across the country to a little town called Los Angeles to take up residence with her honey whom we will call “Furry Chopra”. This being said, I offered to make the trip with her to her new residence because I apparently have nothing better to do with my vacation time, have an undiagnosed mental condition and enjoy sitting on my behind in a car for 10 hours a day. Truth be told, taking a cross country road trip has been a desire of mine, though I hadn’t thought about it in years….so perhaps I should say taking a cross country road trip was a desire of the younger, more able bodied A. Nonetheless, an older, more distinguished (aka: gray haired) version of A woke up last Sunday morning with a hangover the size of Texas (I can verify that as I have actually seen the size of Texas with my own pretty green eyes), got in a car, and drove 3,000 miles to L.A. with the KFBS and all her worldly possessions.
It was hashed out that if we were to take a road trip it would be a true road trip: lots of stops, lots of junk food, lots of photos with the “world’s largest fill in the blank”, restaurants we’ve never heard of, and being sucked into every tourist trap imaginable.
The first stop on the trip after a painstaking (remember the size of texas here) 12 hours in the car was New Orleans. It was everything I imagined it to be….streets full of drunk people even though it was a Sunday night, the smell of vom and beer left over from mardi gras which had wrapped up the week prior, beads, and delicious tummy tearing up cajun food. I will without a doubt be making a trip back to take in a little more of the New Orleans life.
The second stop was in Houston, where we visited the “Beer Can House”. I mean, come on, I’m A, of course I stopped here. It was wonderful and shiney and I imagine a lot like what my retirement will look like.
Next stop was River Walk in San Antonio. It was entirely too chilly and snowy to truly enjoy the beautiful area but we tried with all our might anyway. At the Kissy Faced Booty Shakers request we ate at an authentic Texas restaurant called Texas Roadhouse. If you are ever in Texas and want some local fare, be sure to check it out. After that I was excited for our next stop for dinner in Arizona so we could try this hidden gem a friend told us about called Arizona Pizza!
Fort Stockton Texas provided an opportunity to see the world’s second largest roadrunner, and Arizona provided the prettiest of skies I had seen in quite some time.
Our last days were spent in Big Bear where two of the world’s clumsiest girls decided to give snowboarding a try. FYI: For those who think if you can surf, you can snowboard, you are wrong. By the end of the day I was calling myself a badass snowboarder and the KFBS was nursing her bruised behind. Post snowboarding it was a trip to the store for a bottle of ibuprofen and a six pack of blue moon to chase it down.
Finally, I got to experience my first red eye flight. It made for a rough Sunday afternoon baby shower after getting a collective three hours of sleep obtained in 45 second increments on an airplane. All in all it was a fantastic trip, I got to see places I probably never would have otherwise, stay in some of the nation’s finest motels, I got to spend some great QT with a fantastic friend who I adore, and I have a head full of memories that will last a lifetime.
As you may have read recently, the Kissy Faced Booty Shaker decided to take a big leap and move all the way across the country to a little town called Los Angeles to take up residence with her honey whom we will call “Furry Chopra”. This being said, I offered to make the trip with her to her new residence because I apparently have nothing better to do with my vacation time, have an undiagnosed mental condition and enjoy sitting on my behind in a car for 10 hours a day. Truth be told, taking a cross country road trip has been a desire of mine, though I hadn’t thought about it in years….so perhaps I should say taking a cross country road trip was a desire of the younger, more able bodied A. Nonetheless, an older, more distinguished (aka: gray haired) version of A woke up last Sunday morning with a hangover the size of Texas (I can verify that as I have actually seen the size of Texas with my own pretty green eyes), got in a car, and drove 3,000 miles to L.A. with the KFBS and all her worldly possessions.
It was hashed out that if we were to take a road trip it would be a true road trip: lots of stops, lots of junk food, lots of photos with the “world’s largest fill in the blank”, restaurants we’ve never heard of, and being sucked into every tourist trap imaginable.
The first stop on the trip after a painstaking (remember the size of texas here) 12 hours in the car was New Orleans. It was everything I imagined it to be….streets full of drunk people even though it was a Sunday night, the smell of vom and beer left over from mardi gras which had wrapped up the week prior, beads, and delicious tummy tearing up cajun food. I will without a doubt be making a trip back to take in a little more of the New Orleans life.
The second stop was in Houston, where we visited the “Beer Can House”. I mean, come on, I’m A, of course I stopped here. It was wonderful and shiney and I imagine a lot like what my retirement will look like.
Next stop was River Walk in San Antonio. It was entirely too chilly and snowy to truly enjoy the beautiful area but we tried with all our might anyway. At the Kissy Faced Booty Shakers request we ate at an authentic Texas restaurant called Texas Roadhouse. If you are ever in Texas and want some local fare, be sure to check it out. After that I was excited for our next stop for dinner in Arizona so we could try this hidden gem a friend told us about called Arizona Pizza!
Fort Stockton Texas provided an opportunity to see the world’s second largest roadrunner, and Arizona provided the prettiest of skies I had seen in quite some time.
Our last days were spent in Big Bear where two of the world’s clumsiest girls decided to give snowboarding a try. FYI: For those who think if you can surf, you can snowboard, you are wrong. By the end of the day I was calling myself a badass snowboarder and the KFBS was nursing her bruised behind. Post snowboarding it was a trip to the store for a bottle of ibuprofen and a six pack of blue moon to chase it down.
Finally, I got to experience my first red eye flight. It made for a rough Sunday afternoon baby shower after getting a collective three hours of sleep obtained in 45 second increments on an airplane. All in all it was a fantastic trip, I got to see places I probably never would have otherwise, stay in some of the nation’s finest motels, I got to spend some great QT with a fantastic friend who I adore, and I have a head full of memories that will last a lifetime.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
